Let's Take a Moment

Recently, my family suffered the unexpected loss of a very dear soul. A young man who had experienced more pain than some people ever experience took his own life. There are those who have said, “He’s not in pain anymore” and that brings a bit of comfort but it doesn’t end the questions asked by others. “Why didn’t I think more when he did this?” Or “Why didn’t I ask him about that?” Those are all the questions you would never have thought to ask because when you are sunken deep into the comfortable cushions of friend and family relationships, you trust that you know all there is to know. We all take our relationships for granted from time to time; the thing is no matter how attentive we are we can never know everything there is to know going on inside another’s mind.

My emotions, my thoughts are raw right now but I feel compelled to come to this page and share. I feel that in the last week, I have learned invaluable life-long lessons, things I want to share in the hopes that they inspire but, mainly, so that I don’t ever forget.

The greatest thing we do in our lives is help one another, provide encouragement and share our love. No amount of money, no number of possessions can ever take the place of a simple kind word or the extension of love. Honestly and truly, there could never be anything more important.

Do you realize the power of one kind word – just one? Let’s look at it from this angle, one negative comment has the power to make a child rip up a drawing, think they are no good and never pick up a crayon or drawing instrument again. Repeated negativity can cause a person to pack away all the beauty they have inside. They lose the idea of “who they are” and become “what others want them to be” in the hopes that they will be loved.

Granted, there are people who rise above negative talk; it just seems to roll off their shoulders. They become successful but sometimes they seek success as a way to prove they are worthwhile. They work and work and work to validate their existence to the one or ones who never supported them.

People, especially children, shouldn’t have to work for love. We work to prove that we are trustworthy or caring or a good friend but love…we feel it when we meet people. Loving someone doesn’t come from seeing what they can give us or seeing how hard they are willing to work for it. Loving someone is about seeing who they are, their soul, and loving the beauty that radiates from them.

This young man wanted to hear one, kind word from one, important person in his life. He wanted to hear, “I love you” just once but he never did. He could have heard it from a million people but it wouldn’t have mattered because there was one person who meant the world to him that never extended compassion. We need the people who serve as the pillars of our foundation to share kindheartedness and encouragement just as a flower needs nourishment and water to grow.

We all have bad days and we all have moments where we snap at our kids or our loved ones, especially when we are stretched beyond our means. We’re human and it’s ok to have those off days as long as we remember later to extend some warmth and some love.

Over the last few years, this young man had turned to art. Many of the people in his life did not know he had a crafty bone in his body. They were surprised to see that he could create everything from poetry to scrapbooks. He let the difficult things that happened to him and the poor choices he’d made come to life through words and images and serve as a story to help others to believe in their abilities and stay on the right path.

We cannot save everyone. We cannot take away the pain – great and small – that we all experience in this life. But we can share kindness. We can encourage others to believe in themselves by sharing one, thoughtful word. We can say sorry when we are wrong, we can share our own stories, our talents, our crafts with others. We can share our heart and mind even when it’s scary to be vulnerable. There are times when we might feel lost and powerless but in those moments, it is vital to remember that we are incredibly powerful beings. We have the power to use words, images or both to touch someone’s life and make it a little bit better.

Today, I invite you to share a kind word with someone. I invite you to hug your children, your spouses, your loved ones and remind them why they are so special to you and tell them you love them.

I think you are magical and I send you tons of love.